Hey guys, sorry about the delayed response. I see that some of you are on the edges of your seats
Such good friends you are..
So you want a happy ending huh? Well here I am, healthy, rejuvinated, reborn, and still feeling the electricity of life. Is that happy enough? Is it not 'happy' that the girl and I are seemingly inded over, if that's the kind of response you were looking for? Well that's the reality of it and the black and white answer for now.
Today was the first day I've seen her in a week or two and it was also the first time that I didn't feel like crap when we said goodbye to eachother. It's come to the point that when I look at her, I see her as more of an artifact of a past life of mine- I appreciate her and positive memories dance in my head when I see her, but the emotional attachments and any need whatsoever for her compassion have literally seemed to be reduced to zero. It's harsh to say, but I think I can honestly say that she's becoming more of a memory every day that goes by.
I hope the conclusion to this post hasn't come across as too somber. It is in thought, but as cheesy as it sounds, like a phoenix I feel I've risen from the ashes of this once-beautiful relationship and am finally ready for life. I recently met an unexplainably beautiful person who has helped me through my "rebuilding phase." The pivotal, emotional phases were largely spent with family, friends, and here on the forum, and I met this person when I was past this mopey phase and well into the become-who-I-used-to-be phase which has been such an amazing experience. My optimism has been well reinstated and I now carry this experience in my back pocket as something I hold extremely dear to me because I've learned so much from it.
It blows my mind that people have wanted to know the outcome of all of this, so much that they've made posts asking me to follow up. You guys are all amazing individuals... Words can't and won't ever do it justice so I'll just leave it at that.
-T
"I still hear your voice from across the horizon,
And wasn't that you walking into the shadows?
In time I'll believe it was just and illusion,
In time I'll believe it was only a dream..."