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Seaver, I agree that a lot of people don't reason it through. I would also say that many people who do cheat and try to justify it at a later time, honestly try to convince themselves that they are justified.
As an example from the "Can you be driven to cheat thread", an issue was brought up about neglect being the justifying factor for a cheating action. My response there is that regaining your self esteem (through the acceptance of another when cheating) from a neglect factor compromises your self respect and honesty... it's not justified, it's a false fix. That is faulty reasoning / logic. The underlying problem is a self-esteem issue. Obviously, the cheater has no grasp of how to handle being treated neglectfully, and that to me is a bigger problem to the individual than an act of being unfaithful. The problem of not being able to handle their own self esteem will continue to create problems long after they have picked themselves up off the curb, licked their wounds, and moved on to a new relationship, possibly to even do the whole thing over.
My main point with this thread is to broaden the scope of issues related to cheaters and cheating, why the zero tolerance before looking at why it happened?
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To those who wander but who are not lost...
~ Knowledge is not something you acquire, it is something you open yourself to.
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