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xepherys · 11-30-2005, 01:47 PM

Haha, I'm not saying you should smack them around or beat them to a pulp... but I got spanked as a child. And I can recall specifically learning those lessons very well. My ten year old son... I've had to spank him ONCE ever in his life. He's VERY well behaved. That single time was the last time he ever "begged" me for things, and also the last time he talked back. He's not afraid of me. I didn't have to leave bruises or beat him half to death. Two good swats on the ass, in the middle of a store did him a world of good. Also, I'm amused by your background with therapists. I have a couple in my family that I find to be useless as hell. I don't have a bad temper at all. Your comment "and can become enraged at the drop of a hat"... how has it any bearing? Do I have a short temper, or does the OP, because it was enraging that kids were throwing a living animal against a wall? Oh, only because I disagree with your viewpoint is in a temperment issue. Hmmm, interesting. I wonder what your therapist parents would have to say to that.

Psychology and therapy is not really a science as much as an interpretive artistic practice. Over the course of any decade, a lot comes and goes. Sure, this is true with any science, but psychology can actually scar people. If they decide that the half life of plutonium was previously incorrect, this does not lead to problems with someone's psyche. If they determine that hey, maybe the Ferber method is bad... well, let's hope those kids aren't too screwed up. Frankly, I find psychology to be nothing more than a slightly better accepted phrenology. So using the fact that you have therapists as parents does little or nothing in my eyes to better your PoV.

Hmm, let me take some of MY examples:

* I was spanked as a child, and I'm not violent. I've been in one fight in my life, it was in high school, and I was defending myself. I must be a real bastard because my parents "hit" me. Oddly enough, from an environmental factor, both of my paretns smoked and my dad (and many on his side) were raging alcholics. I'm neither. Wow, it's CRAZY how that childhood environment so shapes our lives. It's called having a choice of how we turn out.

* I have a cousin whose mother tried discipling him repsectfully. She explained things, she was consistant, and even got him evalutaed and eventually medicated. He was STILL a total asshole for the first 20 years of his life, torturing animals of all sorts and being rather psychotic. Must've been that healthy hands-off approach.

I think the point I'm trying to make is that neither nessecarily work for EVERY kid. But a kid like that... what do you think therapy will do for him? Therapy helps less kids than one might think. However, unlike adults, kids (even disturbed ones) tend to seek approval from adults. This would include saying things that shrinks want to hear, and making it seem like progress was being made. In fact, that's exactly how I treated my psychologist that I saw after my dad died. I was pushed into it by family (I didn't WANT therapy) and so I made the best of it by "going along with the program". It's fairly typical behavior from children, as I'm sure many child development folk might concur with. It's crazy how rock solid that psychology stuff is, huh?

As a side note, I'm sorry if you got "a good ass kicking" confused with actaully bludgeoning a kid. When I hear someone say "a whalloping" "ass kicking" or other term, I tend to take it half heartedly. I doubt most people who actually beat the hell out of their kids with fists and feet would advertise as such. Maybe it's just my military background speaking. A drill sergeant might "kick our ass"... it didn't mean we bled out by the end of the day. I would NEVER hit my child with the intent to injure him. EVER! Sorry if that got misconstrued. However, I stand by my (now reworded) argument. There are also situations where the only truly appropriate punishment is a spanking.

Oh, just read the bottom of your first paragraph. I have a 10-year old son and a newborn baby son. Neither of them will EVER get actually beaten in a violent fashion. Both are apt (well, not the baby... obviously) to get a spanking if they so deserve... even my 10 year old... I'm not an abusinve parent, and I have plenty of experience thank you.

11-30-2005, 01:47 PM	#51 (permalink)
xepherys <3 TFP Location: 17TLH2445607250	Haha, I'm not saying you should smack them around or beat them to a pulp... but I got spanked as a child. And I can recall specifically learning those lessons very well. My ten year old son... I've had to spank him ONCE ever in his life. He's VERY well behaved. That single time was the last time he ever "begged" me for things, and also the last time he talked back. He's not afraid of me. I didn't have to leave bruises or beat him half to death. Two good swats on the ass, in the middle of a store did him a world of good. Also, I'm amused by your background with therapists. I have a couple in my family that I find to be useless as hell. I don't have a bad temper at all. Your comment "and can become enraged at the drop of a hat"... how has it any bearing? Do I have a short temper, or does the OP, because it was enraging that kids were throwing a living animal against a wall? Oh, only because I disagree with your viewpoint is in a temperment issue. Hmmm, interesting. I wonder what your therapist parents would have to say to that. Psychology and therapy is not really a science as much as an interpretive artistic practice. Over the course of any decade, a lot comes and goes. Sure, this is true with any science, but psychology can actually scar people. If they decide that the half life of plutonium was previously incorrect, this does not lead to problems with someone's psyche. If they determine that hey, maybe the Ferber method is bad... well, let's hope those kids aren't too screwed up. Frankly, I find psychology to be nothing more than a slightly better accepted phrenology. So using the fact that you have therapists as parents does little or nothing in my eyes to better your PoV. Hmm, let me take some of MY examples: * I was spanked as a child, and I'm not violent. I've been in one fight in my life, it was in high school, and I was defending myself. I must be a real bastard because my parents "hit" me. Oddly enough, from an environmental factor, both of my paretns smoked and my dad (and many on his side) were raging alcholics. I'm neither. Wow, it's CRAZY how that childhood environment so shapes our lives. It's called having a choice of how we turn out. * I have a cousin whose mother tried discipling him repsectfully. She explained things, she was consistant, and even got him evalutaed and eventually medicated. He was STILL a total asshole for the first 20 years of his life, torturing animals of all sorts and being rather psychotic. Must've been that healthy hands-off approach. I think the point I'm trying to make is that neither nessecarily work for EVERY kid. But a kid like that... what do you think therapy will do for him? Therapy helps less kids than one might think. However, unlike adults, kids (even disturbed ones) tend to seek approval from adults. This would include saying things that shrinks want to hear, and making it seem like progress was being made. In fact, that's exactly how I treated my psychologist that I saw after my dad died. I was pushed into it by family (I didn't WANT therapy) and so I made the best of it by "going along with the program". It's fairly typical behavior from children, as I'm sure many child development folk might concur with. It's crazy how rock solid that psychology stuff is, huh? As a side note, I'm sorry if you got "a good ass kicking" confused with actaully bludgeoning a kid. When I hear someone say "a whalloping" "ass kicking" or other term, I tend to take it half heartedly. I doubt most people who actually beat the hell out of their kids with fists and feet would advertise as such. Maybe it's just my military background speaking. A drill sergeant might "kick our ass"... it didn't mean we bled out by the end of the day. I would NEVER hit my child with the intent to injure him. EVER! Sorry if that got misconstrued. However, I stand by my (now reworded) argument. There are also situations where the only truly appropriate punishment is a spanking. Oh, just read the bottom of your first paragraph. I have a 10-year old son and a newborn baby son. Neither of them will EVER get actually beaten in a violent fashion. Both are apt (well, not the baby... obviously) to get a spanking if they so deserve... even my 10 year old... I'm not an abusinve parent, and I have plenty of experience thank you.