I understand where you're coming from Gilda. People just don't know what I'm going through just to start a "normal" conversation. Am I going to say something offensive to this person? What if I pronouce a word wrong, or slur my speech what's this person's name again? Am I getting my point across!? What if they don't hear me!? Oh, I hope I don't have to repeat myself!! My heart's beating 120mph and all those things are running through my head It's inevitable that I'm going to screw up something. My stress level has hit the ceiling and I just have to get away as fast as possible. Then after I finally pull through the conversation I replay it in my head until I come to the conclusion that I made a total ass out of myself even though the person I was talking to most likely never gave the conversation a second thought.
It's not like you can just choose to not let something affect you. I don't think Gilda wants to stay shy, but you can't just become assertive without causing tons of stress and anxiety. I wish nothing fazed me, I would love to just jump into a conversation with a stranger without worrying about saying the right thing but I would hate to cause myself a ton of stress and anxiety with an off-chance that I'll get over it and never have to worry about it again. I'd rather just stay shy and avoid it all. I assume that Gilda is feeling the same way.
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“It is better to be rich and healthy than poor and sick” - Dave Barry
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