Thank you for the support. It helps, it matters, it makes things better.
In response to a few of the above comments:
1. The hospital visitation could have gone worse. To its credit, the hospital didn't oppose Grace's motion to be appointed my guardian (there's some technical term for it that I forget).
2. Sissy's lost semester doesn't bother her. She was planning to transfer to the same school I'll be teaching at this coming year the end of her sophomore year. We're not sure whether we can get her in in January, but the people at the new school are willing to work with us, so I don't think she'll be losing a year. But it doesn't seem to bother her either way. It also gives her a little more distance from her former life and identity, which should make things easier for her in a lot of ways. For her privacy, I'd rather not mention the school.
3. I'm ambivilent about HIPAA, because it offers a layer of protection against Sissy being outed through her medical records and treatments. It's the interaction of it and the same-sex marriage laws that creates the problem. I think it would be preferable to fix the problem on that end, but then again, there's the larger problem of anyone whose choice to make medical decisions isn't legally next of kin. Grace fortunately had Sissy and a living will and access to a highly respected lawyer (through my father in law).
Others who don't have an airtight living will and rich father in law probably wouldn't have been as fortunate as we were.
4. I'm ambivilent about the HRC. They do nominally campaign for GLBT rights, but have in the past tended to deal away trans rights very quickly or not even try to get them as part of the package when lobbying for gay rights. This bothers me. I'm not sure I'd want to bargain away my sister's rights to get mine.
5. Sissy insisted that I post this response to what I said about her having made peace with our parents: "Those people aren't my parents. They were . . . "his" parents. They don't know me. They know nothing about me. Look at all those things you said about how parents shape their children. That's what you and Grace helped to do for me. That's why I've made peace with it. I had you to do for me what they wouldn't."
6. This place helps me in times of stress like you can't imagine. Thank you, all of you.
Gilda
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I'm against ending blackness. I believe that everyone has a right to be black, it's a choice, and I support that.
~Steven Colbert
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