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Charlatan, your post was great and is, for the most part, how I feel about it as well. I think marriage can be a very important symbol/declaration/celebration of committment to one another.
As for who asks, I'm pretty ambivalent about it. I will say though, regarding the possibility of asking before the other person is ready (brought up mostly in the context of the female asking), if you don't already know what the answer will genuinely be, I don't think you're at a point in your relationship where you should be considering marriage.
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Le temps détruit tout
"Musicians are the carriers and communicators of spirit in the most immediate sense." - Kurt Elling
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