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Sorceress · 10-20-2005, 11:12 PM

Oh dear fellow! That is such a hard question to answer. I understand what you are both going through, because it happened to me a long time ago. It took me three years to get over the initial pain and 9 to stop blaming myself for that which could not have been otherwise.
She may feel that there really was no choice, but that she didn't really want to give it up. If that is the case she will waever in how she feels and it will be hard to be supportive, because she feeling so changeable. The only thing I can suggest is that you be very kind and patient, and ask her when she makes these comments how she's feeling now and if she would like to talk about it, and what you can do to help her feel understood. show her that you really want to understand and communicate and that you're trying. If you do that she will appreciate it. I promise.

10-20-2005, 11:12 PM	#42 (permalink)
Sorceress Upright	Oh dear fellow! That is such a hard question to answer. I understand what you are both going through, because it happened to me a long time ago. It took me three years to get over the initial pain and 9 to stop blaming myself for that which could not have been otherwise. She may feel that there really was no choice, but that she didn't really want to give it up. If that is the case she will waever in how she feels and it will be hard to be supportive, because she feeling so changeable. The only thing I can suggest is that you be very kind and patient, and ask her when she makes these comments how she's feeling now and if she would like to talk about it, and what you can do to help her feel understood. show her that you really want to understand and communicate and that you're trying. If you do that she will appreciate it. I promise. __________________ Born of mist and dreams, chapters from an alternate mind.