I would try a few nights with you giving her a massage and some oral. When she finishes, give her a kiss on the cheek and snuggle off to bed. Don't ask for a thing!!! After you do this a couple of times, it will suggest that sex can be one-sided and still good. She will probably want to try it with the roles reversed.
You are 100% responsible for your own sexual happiness. The only way to find it is to talk about it.
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