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Originally Posted by Gilda
The reason is that what offends us differs greatly from person to person. If a man hits on me, he's implicitly questioning my sexuality by suggesting he thinks I'm straight. So long as he's polite and doesn't put his hands on me, I likely wouldn't be offended. Heck, I actually find it a bit amusing much of the time. Yet some find a challenge to their sexuality so offensive that they respond violently, even to the point of murder.
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And if a very pretty straight man were to hit on you pretending he was a woman and went down on you?
Or perhaps if I went up to your SO and said something about the 'ugly bulldyke cunt' she was with?
Everyone has their point where the shock of the insult, the level it, and the amount of disrespect will result in a violent (and justified) response. If I know someone is trying to provoke me, its easy to let the logical part of your brain absorb the insult, but the violent response comes more from the suddeness of the attack, much as if you were attacked physically and the response is the same.
Luckily for us, such insults are rather rare and we are not often forced to face our reactions to them, but when they do occur who do you blame for the resulting violence?
Oh and a side note, I’ve seen first hand what happens when a straight male hits on (or in one case even spoke to) a lesbian who has a more masculine partner. My poor room mate in college had a bad habit of accidentally doing this.
