pig

wolf,

Have you tried staring at her incredulously? You might ask her if she'd let you put a little toupee on her back, so that she'll look a little hairier...oh wait, wrong advise...really, it sounds to me like y'all need a little talky talk about respecting open communication. Unless there's more to the story (you don't have picture of brad pitt in a speedo above your bed or anything?) then you admitting that you have a little fetish involving her anus should not result in her attacking your sexual libido. I assume you've tried explaing to her why you do like it?

edit deleted subliminal enticement to toil

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You don't love me, you just love my piggy style