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raeanna74 · 09-11-2005, 06:42 PM

Yeah I have seen how holding fast on the battles helps.

These aren't full on tantrums. I think she's learned for the time being that those don't work.

This is just a habit of asking in a whining tone. I say habit but it's not something we've EVER allowed. She just constantly complains about everything. I correct her and she'll go on fine about that subject. But then it's something else less than 2 minutes later. Like with her socks this morning. - our narrative went this way.

"I can't get my socks on."
Yes you can.
(drops one sock)
"I can't reach my sock."
Sure you can get down and get it.
"I can't get them on."
Keep trying, you're doing well.
(she finally gets the socks on and I help her with her shoes)
"I'm hungry"
We're going to Hardees to bring some breakfast home for Daddy and us."
"I want to go inside."
We can.
(we walk out to the car)
"I want to sit up front with you."
You know you can't. Sit in the back and I'll let you choose the music. Buckle up hon.
"I did." (she hadn't)
I'm sorry hon but we're not going anywhere until you buckle up.
"Do I haveta?!" (I give her the look and she buckles.)

I could continue this narrative indefinately. The problem isn't outright tantrums but a constantly dragging her feet and bucking every last thing I do. Nothing is ENOUGH, or it's always asking TOO much of her. She can't, her legs hurt, she's hungry, she has to go potty... ANYTHING to keep her from cooperating at the first. I realize she's attempting to exert her own control over herself at the very least. At the age of 5 she's not capable of being able to make all the decisions. I also want her to be willing and able to do things for herself. I want to give her independance in ways but yet when she pushes me every last tiny step it becomes so frustrating.

09-11-2005, 06:42 PM	#10 (permalink)
raeanna74 I'm not a blonde! I'm knot! I'm knot! I'm knot! Location: Upper Michigan	Yeah I have seen how holding fast on the battles helps. These aren't full on tantrums. I think she's learned for the time being that those don't work. This is just a habit of asking in a whining tone. I say habit but it's not something we've EVER allowed. She just constantly complains about everything. I correct her and she'll go on fine about that subject. But then it's something else less than 2 minutes later. Like with her socks this morning. - our narrative went this way. "I can't get my socks on." Yes you can. (drops one sock) "I can't reach my sock." Sure you can get down and get it. "I can't get them on." Keep trying, you're doing well. (she finally gets the socks on and I help her with her shoes) "I'm hungry" We're going to Hardees to bring some breakfast home for Daddy and us." "I want to go inside." We can. (we walk out to the car) "I want to sit up front with you." You know you can't. Sit in the back and I'll let you choose the music. Buckle up hon. "I did." (she hadn't) I'm sorry hon but we're not going anywhere until you buckle up. "Do I haveta?!" (I give her the look and she buckles.) I could continue this narrative indefinately. The problem isn't outright tantrums but a constantly dragging her feet and bucking every last thing I do. Nothing is ENOUGH, or it's always asking TOO much of her. She can't, her legs hurt, she's hungry, she has to go potty... ANYTHING to keep her from cooperating at the first. I realize she's attempting to exert her own control over herself at the very least. At the age of 5 she's not capable of being able to make all the decisions. I also want her to be willing and able to do things for herself. I want to give her independance in ways but yet when she pushes me every last tiny step it becomes so frustrating. __________________ "Always learn the rules so that you can break them properly." Dalai Lama My Karma just ran over your Dogma.