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In fact, pan6467 was kidnapped by the Illuminati months ago and now resides on... The Island. They've replaced him with a look-alike, but cracks were showing through, necessitating that the Illuminati stage an elaborate hoax detailing several minor changes to pan6467's account followed by a post highlighting those changes and therefore removing suspicion from the double and placing it on some non-existant third party. Our task now is to find out what pan6467 knew that necessitated him being moved to... The Island and to attempt to free him. It's a dangerous job. And actually I hear that... The Island actually isn't such a bad place to be. And nobody likes danger.
Yeah, on second thought we'll leave him to it, I'm sure he doesn't need our help.
Seriously dude, why would someone break into your account to change 'Jimmy' to 'Jummy'?
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I wake up in the morning more tired than before I slept
I get through cryin' and I'm sadder than before I wept
I get through thinkin' now, and the thoughts have left my head
I get through speakin' and I can't remember, not a word that I said
- Ben Harper, Show Me A Little Shame
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