Starting singing the whole score of either West Side Story or Grease, and make sure you use falsetto for the women characters.
Talk about how you think that the *insert colour that the opponent has* coloured controller is so erotic that you practice fornicating on it.
Hold your controller upside down and if you win once say how much better you are.
Replace his controller with paper mache.
While person goes to the bathroom, replace console with loaf of bread, and controllers with a fishing line, and talk about how the rain of hot dogs yesterday came a little early.
Bring a tazer. Use it. (Also cow-prod works well)
Everytime you loose shout out to the ref saying send him off and smack the controller out of the opponent's hand (even if you aren't playing a sports game. Especially if you aren't playing one).
When playing a MMORPG, compose an email with them around to the mods how he molested you and your gaming experience with his in-game flatuence.
If playing a game with your friends in the neighbourhood, and your friend down the street is hosting it, climb through his window and steal the server and run.
More to come...
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A.minor.fall.then.a.major.lift
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