Bill O'Rights

The answer to your question is...a telephone.
1-800-THEMAID.
For a few extra bucks, sometimes they'll wear those cute little outfits, too.

Actually, I'm only half kidding. 4 college guys, regardless of the amount of "product" in the cabinet, aren't going to actually use it.
For a few buck, each week (divided amoung you), you can have someone come in and take care of it.

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"I distrust those people who know so well what God wants them to do because I notice it always coincides with their own desires." - Susan B. Anthony

"Hedonism with rules isn't hedonism at all, it's the Republican party." - JumpinJesus

It is indisputable that true beauty lies within...but a nice rack sure doesn't hurt.