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My definition of growing up: When your parents aren't stupid anymore.
They love you. They have absolutely no desire to change your behavior for any other reason than that they are looking out for you. When dealing with your parents, remember their motives. They love and care and protect you...although they are not used to having to explain themselves to their kids..and this usually causes resentment on your part, because you think that they are just ordering you around for some sort of commanding satisfaction. Remember their motives, ask them questions, and talk about this stuff. Most parents try most vehemently to steer their kids away from the mistakes they made. I tell you, this is love- not any sort of power trip of theirs! Understand where their coming from. It's not easy rearing children, especially those that are burgeoning into adults.
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The sad thing is... as you get older you come to realize that you don't so much pilot your life, as you just try to hold on, in a screaming, defiant ball of white-knuckle anxious fury 
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