muay thai is a very effective style, as is kali. The fact that you've found a dojo that combines those two and adds in grappling skills is pretty impressive. You should definitely give them a shot.
And hunnychile,
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find the best form without lots of study and reading & pain.
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Short answer? You can't. There is no martial art that will turn you into a jedi overnight with no hard work. There is no martial art that will teach you to fight well without pain being involved. I'm not saying you'll be limping home from the dojo every night in search of bandages and a tourniquet, but you have to expect to take a few hits if you're learning to fight.