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Jinn · 08-02-2005, 11:17 AM

SIN MADE THE BEST POST IN THIS THREAD. READ IT!!!!!!!!!!!!

"Sex with pressure, with too much hanging on emotions and confidences and securities ... meh. "

GOD-Fucking_DAMNIT! YES! YES! YES! The prepubescent idea that I got from porn, that she "had to come".. nearly destroyed my sex life. She doesn't NEED to come, and neither do you. Sex is about enjoying the other person; it's like a birthday party. Your partner is having a huge fucking birthday party (pun intended) and you really care if the party ends with a big bang? They had a damn birthday party for you! Enjoy the party while it lasts, and your friends are there, and you're eating the cake. Don't spend the whole party waiting for the end. By putting all of this pressure on myself to make her cum, and her putting all this pressure on herself to make ME cum.. my sex life was going dowwwwwn hill. If I even sensed the fact that she wasn't 100% enjoying it, I felt inadequate and my third leg reacted accordingly. I can't tell you the number of times I "failed" because I felt like I was "failing" -- you'll make yourself a self-fufilling prophecy. Likewise, my girlfriend is the Hope Diamond of orgasms.. there's no fuckin way you're gettin that.. and if you somehow stumble on it -- GOOD WORK! I could bother myself feeling inadequate that I don't make her orgasm (and I do sometimes).. but my ultimate concern is that she enjoys what I do NOW.

edit: just to clarify; that's not to say you SHOULDN'T care, by all means you should.. but don't make it the only thing that makes sex worthwile. and most importantly, don't think sex (or you, or your partner) are a faillure if orgasm of either party doesn't occur.

08-02-2005, 11:17 AM	#34 (permalink)
Jinn Lover - Protector - Teacher Location: Seattle, WA	SIN MADE THE BEST POST IN THIS THREAD. READ IT!!!!!!!!!!!! "Sex with pressure, with too much hanging on emotions and confidences and securities ... meh. " GOD-Fucking_DAMNIT! YES! YES! YES! The prepubescent idea that I got from porn, that she "had to come".. nearly destroyed my sex life. She doesn't NEED to come, and neither do you. Sex is about enjoying the other person; it's like a birthday party. Your partner is having a huge fucking birthday party (pun intended) and you really care if the party ends with a big bang? They had a damn birthday party for you! Enjoy the party while it lasts, and your friends are there, and you're eating the cake. Don't spend the whole party waiting for the end. By putting all of this pressure on myself to make her cum, and her putting all this pressure on herself to make ME cum.. my sex life was going dowwwwwn hill. If I even sensed the fact that she wasn't 100% enjoying it, I felt inadequate and my third leg reacted accordingly. I can't tell you the number of times I "failed" because I felt like I was "failing" -- you'll make yourself a self-fufilling prophecy. Likewise, my girlfriend is the Hope Diamond of orgasms.. there's no fuckin way you're gettin that.. and if you somehow stumble on it -- GOOD WORK! I could bother myself feeling inadequate that I don't make her orgasm (and I do sometimes).. but my ultimate concern is that she enjoys what I do NOW. edit: just to clarify; that's not to say you SHOULDN'T care, by all means you should.. but don't make it the only thing that makes sex worthwile. and most importantly, don't think sex (or you, or your partner) are a faillure if orgasm of either party doesn't occur. __________________ "I'm typing on a computer of science, which is being sent by science wires to a little science server where you can access it. I'm not typing on a computer of philosophy or religion or whatever other thing you think can be used to understand the universe because they're a poor substitute in the role of understanding the universe which exists independent from ourselves." - Willravel Last edited by Jinn; 08-02-2005 at 11:20 AM..