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Wow, hard topic. The best charity is helping the person be able to make a living. The next best is anonymous in my book, that they do not have any shame in accepting. It is hard to say what you did is wrong, since I would not feel that it was. A Jewish saying is to embarrass someone is to kill them. To try to help someone in that situation can embarrass them. The only solution is to offer perhaps a loan, no deadline. But either way, on the spot I would remain quiet as well.
I have one story to tell, when I used to go out with a co-worker for meals, we would bag our leftovers, and offer it to the homeless. Once we were walking about to hand some to some man on the street, and he asked what it was. We told him some chicken.. He said “no thanks I had chicken yesterday.” No clue how the story fits, but it somehow does in my head.
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