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wolf · 07-18-2005, 05:19 AM

There needs to be some balance here. Seems to me that she is getting all of the action and you are the one who is just along for the ride. What about what you want or what you need. Maybe there is some compromise here. Your wife cannot ask to take take take here and you give give give. That isn't going to work, eventually you will get drained and not want to give anymore. There is a real unfortunate consequence here. You can let her be with another man, or you can worry about whether or not she is doing it behind your back. I would recommend couples therapy. Is there something that she needs that she isn't getting from your relationship? You could be right that her best friend is influencing her, but this isn't a pair of shoes we're talking about, this is sex with another man. You said that she has hurt you in your marriage before by being with another man, what did you mean by that? Just hanging around another man? Kissing? What happened? This is a big step in any relationship and both parties have to feel 100% rock solid about their relationship before it can happen. Otherwise one person, namely you, is going to become extremely jealous, and that breeds hate. Talk with her see what you can work out, but make sure you are both 100% open and honest with eachother, or this will never work.

07-18-2005, 05:19 AM	#13 (permalink)
wolf Ravenous Location: Right Behind You	There needs to be some balance here. Seems to me that she is getting all of the action and you are the one who is just along for the ride. What about what you want or what you need. Maybe there is some compromise here. Your wife cannot ask to take take take here and you give give give. That isn't going to work, eventually you will get drained and not want to give anymore. There is a real unfortunate consequence here. You can let her be with another man, or you can worry about whether or not she is doing it behind your back. I would recommend couples therapy. Is there something that she needs that she isn't getting from your relationship? You could be right that her best friend is influencing her, but this isn't a pair of shoes we're talking about, this is sex with another man. You said that she has hurt you in your marriage before by being with another man, what did you mean by that? Just hanging around another man? Kissing? What happened? This is a big step in any relationship and both parties have to feel 100% rock solid about their relationship before it can happen. Otherwise one person, namely you, is going to become extremely jealous, and that breeds hate. Talk with her see what you can work out, but make sure you are both 100% open and honest with eachother, or this will never work. __________________ Thousands of years ago, cats were worshipped as Gods. Cats have never forgotten this.