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Originally Posted by monkeysugar
My Theories
4. She was being polite. It's very easy to interpret the wrong way if: (a) you are unfamiliar with their culture, which no matter how much you think you know, you really don't. or (b) you want to think it.
5. She views you as a friend. End of story. You were nice to her, you showed her around, end of story.
6. She might like you, but there's less than 10 days left before she goes away and realistically probably won't be coming back, so really, what's the point?
From what I've personally seen, you're pretty much looking at 4 and 5. Hate to break it to you. Playing "tour guide" is great if you're looking to make friends, and that's really about it.
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Hmm, I'm afraid this makes the most sense. Either/Both cute girls could be more like 4 and 5. But you know what? I'm going to pick the one without a BF and just try, because like what others said, if I don't, I'll never know...
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Originally Posted by twinkle
She forgot her number? Speaking as a female, I am going to be bold and say there is a ninety-nine percent chance that she is not interested in you.
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Probably so. Well, I'm going to have to try anyways, but on the one that "forgot" and not on the one that has a BF. If I find out for sure that she has no interest, I'll lay off in an instant.
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Originally Posted by twinkle
Also, part of what annoyed me about your initial post is that you didn't pick ONE cute girl from the group to try to hit on... you picked two. That means you werent especially intrigued by either, you just want a cute girl to fuck. It comes off as very shallow.
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No, actually, I just didn't explain the story completely enough. I was only romantically interested in the cute one with a BF, but I didn't know she had a BF. Once I found that out, I became much more interested in the other cute one... It's just the one with a BF gives all these mixed signals, its weird. Most likely she is just being friendly, like MonkeySugar said.
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Originally Posted by pinkie
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. I didn't mean to. Just being straight up with you all. Which guys wouldn't refer to a fugly girl as fugly...
A nice guy?
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Maybe yeah. Well, I was a little too nice to begin with, so that's what got me into all these problems in the first place. I should have just told The One I'm Not Interested In that I had zero interest, and rejected her by not giving her my email and phone number.
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Originally Posted by lurkette
It sounds like you were using her and knew you were using her. There's nothing wrong with being nice to someone who's friendly when you're not interested in them. But doing so with the express purpose of using them as a means to get to someone else is pretty slimy. There are two things going on here, though: the situation, and your attitude. It's not the situation that most of us are reacting to: there's a girl who's interested in me, and as long as she's around, the women I'm REALLY interested in won't do anything. That's a valid problem. However, your attitude about it - using the friendly fugly woman to get to her friends, calling her fugly in the first place - is what is setting most of us off.
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Ok, I understand your concerns. I was just trying to be friends with her, and was definitely NOT trying to lead her on. If I could do this again, I will probably still try to be friends with her, but tell her from the get-go that I have zero interest.
Regarding the "fugly" word stuff, I had already realized that people might be offended in the original post, and then had apologized for it *preemptively* in the 3rd post. I really can't say anything else more, except that next time I'll use "unattractive" instead...
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Originally Posted by Ustwo
I think someone has learned an important lesson here.
Never use 'fugly' in mixed company
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Yes. I have learned to never use "fugly" in mixed company, even on the internet.
To some extent, I also felt like an internet forum would be open enough for me to forget the facade of the politics needed for daily interaction in real life. This doesn't mean, you know, I thought I could be rude and obnoxious and disprespectful... just that I could be honest without having to "tone down" or understate my ideas. I only used "fugly" to get across how *unattracive* the girl was *to me*, not to deliberately offend people. I will keep such political ideas of internet forum interaction in mind in the future
And again, I appreciate all of your responses so far. I *have* improved as a person, and gained much more experience through your collective comments, whether they be suggestions or irate bashings at my head.
Suggestions are welcome on deciphering the mixed signals from the girl with BF, though...
and any other suggestions are welcome as well