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CityOfAngels · 07-14-2005, 01:54 AM

No, I'm not talking about computer nerds who violate corporate computer systems. I'm talking about those guys who smack your arms, back, stomach, and sometimes face whenever you drive in a basketball. I HATE 'EM! There are three sizes of hackers:

Big/Tall hackers who don't know how to play, so they swing their big ass arms at your face whenever you go up for a bucket.

Medium-sized hackers who don't know how to play, so whenever you drive in, they decide they're in love with you and give you a big bear-hug.

Short/Small hackers who don't know how to play, so whenever you have the ball, they suddenly become Bruce Lee, and feel that they have to beat on anyone bigger than them to make up for their small size...and small penises.

There's one thing they all have in common: THEY DON'T KNOW HOW TO PLAY! So if you're what we call a hacker, I want you to sit your ass in a chair and read a book, ANY book, that teaches the fundamentals of basketball. You will come to realize that there is such thing as a foul. You will find that there are actually effective ways to play defense by AIMING FOR THE BALL INSTEAD OF MY FACE!

Sorry, it's just I just came back from playing with this group of hooligans whose entire basketball arsenal was the karate chop and bear hug. The funny thing is I STILL balled them up. Why? Because they were too focused on where they should bump me rather than actually playing the game of basketball. I'm sitting here now, and the only time my body was more sore was the day I played basketball at three different gyms, and had to bike all around L.A. to get to each one.

If you are a hack, STAY OFF THE COURT!

07-14-2005, 01:54 AM	#1 (permalink)
CityOfAngels Oh shit it's Wayne Brady! Location: Passenger seat of Wayne Brady's car.	Hackers No, I'm not talking about computer nerds who violate corporate computer systems. I'm talking about those guys who smack your arms, back, stomach, and sometimes face whenever you drive in a basketball. I HATE 'EM! There are three sizes of hackers: Big/Tall hackers who don't know how to play, so they swing their big ass arms at your face whenever you go up for a bucket. Medium-sized hackers who don't know how to play, so whenever you drive in, they decide they're in love with you and give you a big bear-hug. Short/Small hackers who don't know how to play, so whenever you have the ball, they suddenly become Bruce Lee, and feel that they have to beat on anyone bigger than them to make up for their small size...and small penises. There's one thing they all have in common: THEY DON'T KNOW HOW TO PLAY! So if you're what we call a hacker, I want you to sit your ass in a chair and read a book, ANY book, that teaches the fundamentals of basketball. You will come to realize that there is such thing as a foul. You will find that there are actually effective ways to play defense by AIMING FOR THE BALL INSTEAD OF MY FACE! Sorry, it's just I just came back from playing with this group of hooligans whose entire basketball arsenal was the karate chop and bear hug. The funny thing is I STILL balled them up. Why? Because they were too focused on where they should bump me rather than actually playing the game of basketball. I'm sitting here now, and the only time my body was more sore was the day I played basketball at three different gyms, and had to bike all around L.A. to get to each one. If you are a hack, STAY OFF THE COURT!