Yeah, um, speaking as a girl who seriously REGRETS losing my virginity in the *wrong* way...
A) THINK about what you're doing. Are you doing this because you love this guy, or are you doing it because you feel like he won't stay with you unless you have sex/ you don't want to be a virgin anymore/ you just want to. I'm not making virginity out to be as "special" as some people do, but believe me, you will NEVER EVER forget your first time, so you want to make it worthy of remembering.
B) For the love of god, DON'T get drunk. I say this because there are some things in life you need to expierence, and losing your virginity is one of them. Enjoy the moment, enjoy the feeling of being naked with someone you love, enjoy what's happening. If it hurts a little, fine, but that's normal.
C) Go to the gynecologist first!! Get a pelvic exam, talk about birth control, and tell him/her that you are wondering about having sex for the first time- is your hymen thick? Take responsibility for your body!
D) Go slow! And I don't just mean on the night you're planning on having sex. Be spontanieous about it. Have a week where you and your BF do special things every day, like, go for a picnic on Monday, go hiking on Tuesday, go to a romantic dinner on Wednesday, a movie on Thursday, dancing on Friday... make sure that you feel connected with your BF BEFORE you even think about getting naked- it will make the expierence ten times better!!
E) Again, I highly, highly, HIGHLY recommend the book
The Guide to Getting it ON! by Paul Johannes. It's a fabulous human sexuality book with a healthy dose of humor, and it is insanely informative about ALL things sexual. It's got great advice, and I recommend it to ANYONE, sexual dynamos and beginners alike.
This is supposed to be a big deal, don't blow it off by "just getting it over with." Make it something you will remember fondly. I lost my virginity because I didn't want to be a virgin when I went to college, and I'm really really glad I didn't end up with herpes or some other nasty disease... I let my desire to have sex override my good sense. Thinking about the expirence still makes me want to throw up, four years later. *shudder*
Best wishes!
ps- it didn't hurt that bad when I had sex the first time- a bit like two sudden cramps, and I was a little sore afterwards, but it wasn't anywhere near as bad as it's made out to be!
