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The Meaning of Life:
Noel Coward: Good evening, ladies and gentlemen. Here's a little number I tossed off recently in the Caribbean.
[singing]
Noel Coward: Isn't it awfully nice to have a penis? / Isn't it frightfully good to have a dong? / It's swell to have a stiffy. / It's divine to own a dick, / From the tiniest little tadger / To the world's biggest prick. / So, three cheers for your Willy or John Thomas. / Hooray for your one-eyed trouser snake, / Your piece of pork, your wife's best friend, / Your Percy, or your cock. / You can wrap it up in ribbons. / You can slip it in your sock, / But don't take it out in public, / Or they will stick you in the dock, / And you won't come back.
Chaplain: Let us praise God. O Lord...
Congregation: O Lord...
Chaplain: ...Ooh, You are so big...
Congregation: ...ooh, You are so big...
Chaplain: ...So absolutely huge.
Congregation: ...So absolutely huge.
Chaplain: Gosh, we're all really impressed down here, I can tell You.
Congregation: Gosh, we're all really impressed down here, I can tell You.
Chaplain: Forgive us, O Lord, for this, our dreadful toadying, and...
Congregation: And barefaced flattery.
Chaplain: But You are so strong and, well, just so super.
Congregation: Fantastic.
Humphrey: Amen.
Congregation: Amen.
Gaston: My mother told me, "Gaston, there are many people in the world, and in order to get along, you have to try and make everyone happy." That is why I became a waiter, so I can make people happy.
Gaston: [pause] Well, fuck you! You don't need me or my stinking philosiphy! Fuck off! Don't come a following me!
and I rather like.....
Al Czervik: Hey everybody, we're all gonna get laid. - Caddyshack
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