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- "Sweetie! It's time to get up! Isn't this such a wonderful God-created morning? My word, I do believe we could all have a pic-nic after church and count our blessings. Honey? Are you up yet?"
- "Mom, could you give me a break here! I just ran out of Count Chocula and scratched my Cure CD. Also, I just accidentally brushed my heavy curtain aside and got sun ON MY SKIN, which burned. I'm gonna have to rub my silver ankh on the rash until it heals right. Now, leave me the fuck alone for the rest of the morning! I need peace and quiet if I'm to summon the Great Underlord Shibaboo Crushed Velvet, so that he can show me how to stray even further from God. Then, I'm going to jerk off until I'm raw and sore. That reminds me, could you buy my some moisturizer?"
- "Sure thing, my little cherub! You take such good care of yourself! What kind would you like?"
- "Ah, I forget the name, but it's got some black writing on it on a purple background. It's made with the blood of children."
- "OK, sweetums! What's that noise in your room?"
- "Oh, that? I'm watching Adult Swim."
- *gasp*
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A plan is just a list of things that don't happen.
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