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Tilted Cat Head
Administrator
Location: Manhattan, NY
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Did you order a Hot Sausage Pizza?
Quote:
Puns aside, prank no laughing matter
By Bud Kennedy
Star-Telegram Staff Writer
LINK
Thanks to some Keller Indians cheerleaders, sausage pizza will never look the same again.
As if we needed more proof that teen-age girls' interests have gone down the toilet, four Indians cheerleaders face possible dismissal and suspension over a prank that involved a cheese pizza with some very unusual organic toppings.
Make that droppings. The Keller High School girls were given some pizzas by cheerleaders from another school. Instead of eating the pizzas, one Keller girl apparently added her own special adornment.
Then the Keller girls tried to return the pizza -- with their calling card -- to a teacher from the other school, Fossil Ridge, and blame the other girls.
Talk about adding insult to anchovy.
Fortunately, the teachers were smart enough to sniff out this spiteful little bathroom prank.
Seriously, I should point out that when we say "Don't mess with Texas," we definitely mean don't mess with the food.
Under Texas law, messing with somebody else's food is a second-degree felony assault. Poop on a pizza, and you could be dining on prison food for up to 20 years and paying a $10,000 fine.
None of the four cheerleaders faces a criminal or juvenile charge in connection with the June 2 incident in a University of Texas at Arlington dormitory during a cheer camp. Keller has about 50 varsity, junior varsity and ninth-grade cheerleaders, a district spokesman said.
Nobody has suggested that the girls wanted anyone to eat the pizza or that they meant to "cause fear," a lesser third-degree felony that gets you 10 years in prison.
The girls are accused only of a really dumb, lowlife, childish stunt that has embarrassed Keller only two weeks after the Indians' girls softball team proudly won the state championship game and finished No. 1 in the nation.
The pizza prank sounds like something you might see on cable TV.
In fact, it is.
The Comedy Central adult cartoon series Drawn Together stars a lineup of stereotypical animated heroes, characters and princesses, all living in the same house in an animated mock reality show. It's a satirical sendup of both cartoons and MTV shows like The Real World.
According to the Comedy Central Web site, one episode is titled "Dirty Pranky."
The once-sweet-and-innocent Princess Clara's "life is changed forever when she sees Foxxy and Spanky order a sausage pizza."
Spanky Ham, described on the Web site as a "foul-mouthed pig," ruins a pizza and then tries to return it to the delivery driver. Later, he convinces Princess Clara to take a turn.
Maybe Keller has some wannabe Princess Claras.
Told that some real-life teen-age girls had pulled a stunt remarkably similar to their cartoon show, Comedy Central spokeswoman Jenni Runyan responded simply, "Oh, no!"
She seemed surprised and said she would call back.
When she called back, she said, "We have no comment."
I wish she'd said, "Ick! Look, this is only a silly cartoon show. We never thought anyone would be dumb enough to do this!"
Somebody was.
Now, some Keller cheerleaders have a new chant:
"We're No. 2!"
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People are really just dumb.
I'm sorry but to see something on TV and try to emulate it is just plain asinine, especially as something as "common sense" as this.
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