Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community - View Single Post - I just met the girl I've been waiting for...and she's freaking me out

kangaeru · 06-22-2005, 11:08 PM

Update, for those interested.

I called her on Monday, she didn't get back to me. I saw her in the gym and we made small talk but I was kind of like ehh whatever why are you trying to act like everything is normal when you know something is up. She said she might go to a party on the beach with some friends this weekend and she would let me know..I said call me if you want to, I'm not gonna hound you about it and left it at that. So she doesn't call me monday or tuesday, and then I see her again at the gym today when I head in. I'm was pretty curt with her, she tried to talk to me a bit and I was just like yeah, blah blah blah, as soon as someone needed her attention I was like "keep it real" and I left. I went out to my car, pulled out my cell phone and erased her number from my contacts, figuring this was a done deal and I might as well just settle in for some akward gym visits for a while.

Then she called me, at like 10:45. I picked up the phone and was like, 'woah, i almost had a heart attack, I didn't expect to see you calling me again' and she's like I know I'm sorry I haven't called, I just have never done this casual dating thing before and I don't really know what to say after what happened. I was like, just be honest with me. Don't tell me you want to go hang out with me on a weekend then disappear on and flake out on me. Just keep me in the loop, you can have anything from me you want, but decide what it is so I know. I don't let anybody play around with me like that.

So basically we talked for like 15 minutes and settled on the fact that she likes me a lot, we have a connection, but she's single now for the first time in her life, and she loves the freedom, and wants to explore it. I was like hey listen, not to sound arrogant, but you're never going to find anybody better than me. You can go out all you want and get hit on by scumbags at the bar but you're going to find it as empty as I have. We can be whatever you want us to be, I can deal with us hooking up and when you want to go out and have your fun with your girls you can go ahead and do whatever you want, because I know you won't find something better that you want to hold on to.

So the conversation ended kind of on an open note...basically we're not sure if we're going to be friends, fuck buddies, or have a relationship. It's totally up in the air, at this point.

Now personally, I've been single for like 2 years, I'm ready for a relationship. All I can think of at this point is we'll hang out as friends, with some sexual tension hanging in the air, and whenever we party or get under some influences we'll end up fucking. So at least I don't fall into the friend zone. I'm not sure I can handle just being her friend if I have to watch her fall another guy...that I couldn't handle. Didn't say that though.

I expect she'll enjoy being single for a month or two and then she'll have hung around with me enough that she'll want to committ to something. I just need to walk a tight rope until that point comes...

Any suggestions?

06-22-2005, 11:08 PM	#33 (permalink)
kangaeru Crazy Location: on the road to where I want to be...	Update, for those interested. I called her on Monday, she didn't get back to me. I saw her in the gym and we made small talk but I was kind of like ehh whatever why are you trying to act like everything is normal when you know something is up. She said she might go to a party on the beach with some friends this weekend and she would let me know..I said call me if you want to, I'm not gonna hound you about it and left it at that. So she doesn't call me monday or tuesday, and then I see her again at the gym today when I head in. I'm was pretty curt with her, she tried to talk to me a bit and I was just like yeah, blah blah blah, as soon as someone needed her attention I was like "keep it real" and I left. I went out to my car, pulled out my cell phone and erased her number from my contacts, figuring this was a done deal and I might as well just settle in for some akward gym visits for a while. Then she called me, at like 10:45. I picked up the phone and was like, 'woah, i almost had a heart attack, I didn't expect to see you calling me again' and she's like I know I'm sorry I haven't called, I just have never done this casual dating thing before and I don't really know what to say after what happened. I was like, just be honest with me. Don't tell me you want to go hang out with me on a weekend then disappear on and flake out on me. Just keep me in the loop, you can have anything from me you want, but decide what it is so I know. I don't let anybody play around with me like that. So basically we talked for like 15 minutes and settled on the fact that she likes me a lot, we have a connection, but she's single now for the first time in her life, and she loves the freedom, and wants to explore it. I was like hey listen, not to sound arrogant, but you're never going to find anybody better than me. You can go out all you want and get hit on by scumbags at the bar but you're going to find it as empty as I have. We can be whatever you want us to be, I can deal with us hooking up and when you want to go out and have your fun with your girls you can go ahead and do whatever you want, because I know you won't find something better that you want to hold on to. So the conversation ended kind of on an open note...basically we're not sure if we're going to be friends, fuck buddies, or have a relationship. It's totally up in the air, at this point. Now personally, I've been single for like 2 years, I'm ready for a relationship. All I can think of at this point is we'll hang out as friends, with some sexual tension hanging in the air, and whenever we party or get under some influences we'll end up fucking. So at least I don't fall into the friend zone. I'm not sure I can handle just being her friend if I have to watch her fall another guy...that I couldn't handle. Didn't say that though. I expect she'll enjoy being single for a month or two and then she'll have hung around with me enough that she'll want to committ to something. I just need to walk a tight rope until that point comes... Any suggestions?