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My favorite mantra (taken from Tucker Max):
"But you know, I think alcoholism is highly underrated. It gets a bad rap. Think: What really are the detriments to being an alcoholic?
OK, well, let's think about it:
1. It hurts relationships with family and friends? I don't like those people anyway;
2. Causes long term health problems? I drive way too fast to worry about anything long term;
3. Costs money? I'm going to spend it recklessly anyway, better on alcohol than on drugs or pornography;
4. Causes rude and aberrant behavior? I'm an asshole when I'm sober; being drunk actually calms me down.
~Now compare that to it's benefits: It makes me invulnerable to criticism, makes ugly people attractive, makes boring people seem interesting, and makes hot girls like me. For my money, the choice is obvious."
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"I've made only one mistake in my life. But I made it over and over and over. That was saying 'yes' when I meant 'no'. Forgive me."
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