damn -- looks like I read this post too late. i was going to tell him to RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN ..take a breath and RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN from this train to crazytown. Motivation for sex is one thing, but if he wants to have a long term relationship, he won't get it here. If he comes back alive, I'm sure he'll have a story about how she wasn't that bad but she kept talking about her ex-boyfriend. I'm sure she'll have made him even more uncomfortable that she still is attached to this crazy drug-dealing eight-phonecalls-a-day pyscho. It has nothing to do with being Gothic, and that didn't even phase me. There's a million red flags for pyschological problems before you get into the interesting pyschology of wanting to cause or feel pain. Did she not see this happening? He was living with her, she had to know he was doing drugs and getting worse. Came home becuase she got hospitalized? Maybe you should find out if that was from slitting her wrists or overdosing on OxyCoton. If I'm wrong, I'm wrong... but the Fight or Flight response is taking over, and this girl has trouble coming for our poor fellow board patron.
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Second is, if I am mainly subduing my 'wtf' alarms about this girl's freaky behavior
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Most people's "this isn't right" sense is very keen, and you should have a damn good reason for ignoring it.
Unless you have a good reason..
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a) I turn it around and view in a way that it becomes a turn on and b) she's just drop dead hot and I would probably want to have sex with her no matter how weird she was.
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..thats not a good reason. And for crissake man -- you said it yourself.. dating since 14? Sex drive like you say? Better wrap up. Being afraid of her now, having a kid with her and having to be afraid of her for 18 years would be quite the "mindfuck"...
Oy man.. I hope you come back alive, at least.