I think you are learning about boundaries. There has to be some self containment - it gives you needed perspective and a chance to be objective in situations that call for it. You have gone above and beyond, and anything further is giving up yourself - as some have said you would become an enabler. I have a son who is in your position and he did everything he could. Eventually his friends, family and his councellor helped him realize that he could only do so much. The addict has to take responsibility.
Good luck to her.
You, my friend, are a fine fellow indeed.
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And now to disengage the clutch of the forebrain ...
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