well annie, prepare for more drama.....
this guy will not change. i've been in a slightly similar situation as you.. he was abusive emotionally and we always would break up and then get back together. i think this happened a total of three times and spanned a 10 month period (WAY too long, in my opinion).
I think you have a heart, and you take him back because you want things to work out, and want to believe that they can. a few questions for you:
Do you love him?
Are you satisfied with your relationship?
Are you more concerned with your relationship or the *ideal* of a good relationship?
Are you more concerned with your boyfriend or the *ideal* of a good boyfriend?
what I mean about ideals is: are you more concerned with ideals of what you think a good relationship/boyfriend is or the actual reality?
when I was in my relationship, I found that I was fooling myself way too much, and I would try to rationalize his behaviour to the point where it would damage my self esteem and I felt like I *should* be punished or that things *were* my fault. but I held on to him anyway because I became attached and the idea of being in a good relationship I so badly wanted made me think I could just try to work things out and it would change..
he may realize his behaviors, but does he *want* to do anything about it? is he willing to change? simply stating what he did wrong isn't an incentive.
learn to be empowered by saying no.
that's it.
__________________
And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.
~Anais Nin
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