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wow, much advice here and certainly seems heartfelt.
i have four kids, 6, 5, 3 & 1.
i have watched four kids 15 and under brought up by my sister in eula's way.
not a good job. my sister could even be eula, but i read eula is childless.
these kids are useless to society. not evil or bad to society, just useless. my sister and her husband simply let them do what they want, didnt battle them, didnt establish boundaries and now they have some developmental problems looming. the kids lack social skills. a couple of them are book smart, but because of the lack of discipline, dont really have any friends because they are not any fun to be around. they basically watch tv and eat. yes, they are are getting large.
my parents are quite dissappointed as their first grandchildren are basically useless lumps.
on the other hand, by three other sisters and i do have wonderful children and we all share the same theory the majority on this thread do.
i cant tell you the number of times people come up to my wife and i telling us what beautiful children we have and that they are so well behaved.
and this is just from setting boundaries. no yelling, hitting or other punishment.
eula, you might have extraordinary patience or something, or, you seem to want to rail against the machine, but simple letting kids figure it out doesnt help the vast majority of children. one or two might get by with this lord-of-the-flies approach, but, it the big picture, i think it is shameful.
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