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I think it all depends on the setting and tone of the speaker. At college there was one Hall Monitor who was a couple years younger than I was but if she disapproved of ANYTHING, (like innocent goofing off but "too" unladylike laughter) and she'd say "GIRLS! You really should be acting more like ladies." in this prissy voice that made me want to smash a pie in her face. Ug
Otherwise I've had girlfriends say "Hey girl. What's up." and such things and it doesn't bother me at all. They're not saying it in a condescending way.
Normally though I get called Ma'am. In fact I've only been carded once in my life. I must just look older than I am. I hope not though.
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"Always learn the rules so that you can break them properly." Dalai Lama
My Karma just ran over your Dogma. 
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