abaya

Yep, Cyn, that's what I think too. I have enough mayhem in my life as it is from my own family of origin, let alone allowing that to develop in kids of my own.

I enjoy challenges, and I think parenting would be a terrific challenge; however, that doesn't mean I want to be challenged 24-7, and there is NO BREAK from kids. Even after 18, they never go away; they will always need you, even when they don't admit it. I don't feel comfortable with that idea. I've put myself on enough of a punishing schedule during college and grad school, and I definitely want to get to a point of rest and relaxation (as much as one can, while working), with a spouse, before I ever consider kids.

Hell, I'd love to just have permanent R & R with the person I'm married to, without kids running all over the place making us sacrifice us-time. And yes, this is selfish, but I readily admit that I am too selfish to have kids, now or in the near future. Perhaps never. Adoption is something I would always be willing to consider, if I ended up waiting too long after the "prime time" for women to conceive. That's fine with me.

__________________
And think not you can direct the course of Love;
for Love, if it finds you worthy, directs your course.
--Khalil Gibran