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JustJess · 05-18-2005, 08:34 AM

Okay, I'm about to be REALLY honest, and I don't know if you want to hear it. If not, you may wish to skip this post.

I don't think you're being oversensitive or overemotional in the slightest. You may be overreacting to specific incidents, but that is common and understandable after seeing such a trend overall.

In my personal life and observations, I find that actions speak very loudly - including the action of complimenting. I know that I am far from perfect, but my SO makes me feel beautiful and sexy by his words AND his actions. Does yours at least make you feel good by his physical actions during sex? Does he kiss you for no reason? Is it ONLY the verbal missing, or is there no physical appreciation either?
If there ARE "physical compliments" occuring, then I would also attribute this to a communication issue, and try to have a discussion and break the cycle of inaction/no change.
If there aren't any physical compliments occuring, I would leave him. I'm not kidding in the slightest. To me, that says he thinks he's settling for what he can get. He thinks other women are beautiful, but too beautiful for him to obtain, and you're "as good as he's going to get". You don't deserve that kind of bullshit and you should be with someone who knows you are as wonderful as you think they are. If this is the case, he does not appreciate you the way that you should be appreciated. "Chubby" is no reason to accept less than that.
You should be able to feel beautiful in your own confidence, and have that feeling supported and confirmed by your SO. If he does not/cannot do so verbally or physically (and I'm being generous to him to allow only one of those, it should be both for the average mental health) then he shouldn't get to have you.

05-18-2005, 08:34 AM	#17 (permalink)
JustJess Unencapsulated Location: Kittyville	Okay, I'm about to be REALLY honest, and I don't know if you want to hear it. If not, you may wish to skip this post. I don't think you're being oversensitive or overemotional in the slightest. You may be overreacting to specific incidents, but that is common and understandable after seeing such a trend overall. In my personal life and observations, I find that actions speak very loudly - including the action of complimenting. I know that I am far from perfect, but my SO makes me feel beautiful and sexy by his words AND his actions. Does yours at least make you feel good by his physical actions during sex? Does he kiss you for no reason? Is it ONLY the verbal missing, or is there no physical appreciation either? If there ARE "physical compliments" occuring, then I would also attribute this to a communication issue, and try to have a discussion and break the cycle of inaction/no change. If there aren't any physical compliments occuring, I would leave him. I'm not kidding in the slightest. To me, that says he thinks he's settling for what he can get. He thinks other women are beautiful, but too beautiful for him to obtain, and you're "as good as he's going to get". You don't deserve that kind of bullshit and you should be with someone who knows you are as wonderful as you think they are. If this is the case, he does not appreciate you the way that you should be appreciated. "Chubby" is no reason to accept less than that. You should be able to feel beautiful in your own confidence, and have that feeling supported and confirmed by your SO. If he does not/cannot do so verbally or physically (and I'm being generous to him to allow only one of those, it should be both for the average mental health) then he shouldn't get to have you. __________________ My heart knows me better than I know myself, so I'm gonna let it do all the talkin'. Last edited by JustJess; 05-18-2005 at 08:34 AM.. Reason: grammar!