|
Yes, I like to be needed... the validating part is significant, but on days when I am feeling really down, it helps me to pull my head out of my ass and take a good look around. It helps me to see when others are vulnerable, and also encourages me to be more vulnerable and ask for aid when I really need it. When people get too independent then they stop needing anything from other people, and that can be a real drag if the relationship is valuable to you and is based on reciprocity.
Of course, I don't like to be OVERLY needed... that drags me down to where I start to resent the other person for what they can't provide for themselves. Ironic, since I tend to get quite needy myself... but we all go back and forth, what can I say.
Best thing I've tried to do is try to figure out what my needs are, which ones of them are actually reasonable, and then articulate them clearly when the time is right. I can only hope that others do the same with me... though usually, life gets so messy that it's all we can do to just say "help!" and hope that someone's willing to take care of us for a little while.
__________________
And think not you can direct the course of Love;
for Love, if it finds you worthy, directs your course.
--Khalil Gibran
|