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Originally Posted by Cynthetiq
I don't think that it devalues if it's said all the time. I think it's devalued if it's said and there is no actions to back it up. Saying I love you all the time and then choosing to be with your friends/work/hoobbies doesn't show it very well.
As far as my family and friends are concerned, I try to tell them that I love them also as often as I can since I do not live near most of them.
I have been saying I love you to friends that since 9/11.
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Cyn, yeah, I agree with you on all points. Love without works is dead.
Also I used to even dread saying it to my parents a lot before 9/11, since they said it all the time to me, but since that day I have felt much better saying it as often as I can. You really just never know when you might lose someone... and even if you don't lose them, what harm does it cause to say it often, if you mean it? I only see good things that come out of it.
Gilda, I echo everything you said in your e-mail. I think the most powerful comment was this:
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Originally Posted by Gilda
One last thought. Isn't part of loving someone doing things that show your love? And if you're with someone who needs the words, wouldn't telling them be one of those things you could do to show your love?
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This reminds me of the book on the five love languages... anyone read that? It is about learning what ways your partner best receives love (words, touch, gifts, service, or quality time), and how you best receive love. Also, how to adjust so that you can give love to them in the way they need it most, and also adjust so that you can receive what they're offering in return (even if it doesn't always match what you need). Matching up needs, I guess.
Let me ask: has anyone said from their deathbed: "I regret saying 'I love you' so much during my lifetime"? I HIGHLY doubt it... probably the opposite, isn't it? (Gilda, I am thinking about your father... I hope that someday he comes to regret that he never expressed that he loved you.)