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She's not being realistic if she doesn't expect you to react when told that a friend of yours has hit on her. Does she expect you to just carry on the same with him knowing that he tried to take her from you? He obviously doesn't value your friendship, so why should you pretend that nothing happened?
Some things just cannot be included in a "I have something to tell you but you have to promise you won't say anything about it" arrangement, and in my opinion this is one of them.
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