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My now ex-wife got pregnant and had an abortion against my wishes. If the kid was born he/she would be about 10 months old now. I told the ex that I would raise the kid by myself (I already am raising a daughter we had together by myself), and, even if I didn't, we were aware of a family in a good position to raise a child (they were unable to conceive for whatever reason).
Much is made of the mother's mental condition after an abortion, but there is nothing of a father's condition. Is it assumed that the father just does not care? I don't know. But in this case, the father cared VERY MUCH and thinks about this each day.
I am largely pro-choice, mainly because I don't like the thought of the governemtn regulating things in that regard, and the inevitable proliferaton of "back alley" abortions, but I admit I have trouble reconciling my own emotions with being pro-choice. I guess I am pro-choice for others, if both parties involved are fine with the decision. However, it is nothing I would ever suggest, ever.
I had no rights in this decision, and the result will hurt me mentally and spiritually for my entire life, I'm not sure if this is an even trade so the ex would not have to deal with being pregnant for less than a year (as a side note, she had one kid before I met her, and one more with someone else AFTER her abortion, so she has been pregnant a total of 4 times). I do know that if she told me, before we had sex, that if she got pregnant she'd abort, I would not have had sex.
Perhaps the only solution to this is to make sure both people are sure they are on the same page before they have sex.
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