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I grew up being trained to refer to others with "Yes Ma'am" and "No Sir". We were also required to follow any requests with "Please" and "Thankyou".
I have been as careful as I can with teaching my daughter to reply politely and to say "Please" or "Thankyou. I haven't been demanding of the "Yes Ma'am" type of phrase but I've tried to direct her away from "Yeah" to at least a "Yes".
I the store or out where a person who doesn't know me but wants to get my attention and says "Ma'am?" I do feel odd. Mostly cause up until fairly recently the call was made "Miss?" and now it's "Ma'am?" I just feel older. I still appreciate the courtesy.
As for using first names - I tend to use first names with neighbors and the like. When referring to other adults, people in authority, or especially people significantly older than me I tend to call them Mr or Mrs. My in-laws have encouraged me to use first names or whatever I like with them but I just can't call them by their first names. I feel uncomfortable unless I'm using Mom or Dad.
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"Always learn the rules so that you can break them properly." Dalai Lama
My Karma just ran over your Dogma. 
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