rat

wow. i'm honestly sorry that your environment is so devoid of simple courtesies like being called ma'am that you'd feel out of place in that situation...

That's kind of confusing. I use the term "miss" alot in public, especially in crowded areas around campus or at the bars, usually prefaced by the words "Excuse me" as I generally don't know the lady's name of whom I'm referring, and it's a good catchall rather than just saying "you" or "girl" or "move dammit."


Addition: At the bar I work at, I'm the doorman, checking IDs and putting bracelets or stamping people depending on their age. I had one particularly belligerent woman who came in relatively sober, and the owner let her go into the bar/club to find a friend that would pay her cover charge. 30 minutes and 4 drinks later, I found the owner, reported the woman had never come back and paid, and along with him, found the woman in question. He chastised her for lying to his doorstaff about her intentions and told her quite bluntly the consequences of ever doing that again--which then turned into a belligerently drunk lady stabbing me in the chest, bitching me out about how she "wasn't a fucking liar," combined with a refrain of "Yes Ma'am, No Ma'am"s from me for 10 minutes. Rather than losing my cool, I killed her with courtesy until she'd had her say--four repetitions of the same. The next night, she came up and apologized to me citing the fact that though she was extremely angry and wanted to hit me, the fact that I never let my poise crack and didn't get rude back to her prevented her assaulting me. I accepted her apology and told her I was glad that my politeness had kept her from landing herself in jail that night. She thought that over and apologized again.

Moral of story: Manners work. Especially if they're ingrained in a child young. Don't complain

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