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my theory on what's going on:
she was never fine about you not wanting to get married... she likely thought it was a phase that you'd grow out of or that she'd be the one to change your mind... whatever the reason, it doesn't matter. what matters is that after approximately 2 years, she began to realize that there was no "ring" coming her way in the forseeable future, so she started to weigh her options.
she met this guy chris at her work and they started to develop a friendship and he began flirting with her. personally, i don't think she has physically cheated on you, but it has probably crossed her mind. i think that she's hanging out with chris and keeping him close and interested in her without crossing any obvious lines. the fact that she's hiding all this from you gives you good reason to worry, but it doesn't mean you should make assumptions.
if it were me, the issue i'd bring up would be the friday she went to visit him when she said she went to quit her job... you have proof that she is lying so you can use that to help make your case. and once you expose that lie, it should open the gates and be easier to expose the rest of what she's been hiding... including if she's been cheating on you or not.
once you do open all this up, you'll have to completely reevaluate your relationship with her... despite whether she's cheated or not... so be prepared. and by that i mean... figure out just how badly you want to stay with her and what you are and are not willing to forgive.
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