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At the beginning of the thread, xell asks "Why would you be offended by the mere presence of a word as opposed to it’s meaning...?" As I interpret that, it assumes that there can be a disconnect between such a singular word and it's meaning, and I don't believe that's possible for anyone who communicates with words. I assume the word nigger has a definite meaning for any conscious adult who speaks English.
The word is one of those rarified words that is all about power. As with some other words (such as fuck, etc.), it has an undeniable historical offensive meaning, and it retains its vulgarity clearly today. It ought to be on a list like George Carlin's "7 words you can't say on television" (is it?). I think that language naturally has an order to it, and we psychologically reserve a few words (such as nigger, fuck, etc.) to have a persistent punch that will always be recognized as powerful, offensive, edgy, etc. (Lenny Bruce used this idea over and over perfectly in his comedy, teasing knee-jerk reactions to language until he got arrested.) Most of the time, we experience these words socially and at a distance, and we can keep our reactions and emotions about the words we hear in check and in personal perspective.
At the same time, there is no denying that people deliberately use these words at times to offend or intimidate or degrade people in an attempt to show power over them, and I think that a natural or common fear or mistrust of the worst of vulgarities (such as nigger) shouldn't be lost. Some people seem to suggest that we ought to "get past the presence" of the word and "not take offense" to the words. Why would we want that? I know I don't. I want words to adequately express my thoughts and emotions, and I want a range of words to do that. By the same token, I have to allow the same breadth of words and meanings for other people to do the same, in the hope that I can, through language, begin to understand their point of view. Thus these words and the meanings behind them, ugly or not, have to exist and exercise their power. In the same breath, I have to say that at some point I expect to be offended, and to a certain degree I welcome that feeling. Speaking and hearing certain words in certain contexts provides for me a visceral feeling that some honest idea has been conveyed, even if I think it's ugly and it offends me. That conflict makes me think.
I teach my kids that the word nigger stands in for a meaning of hate. From what they have been taught so far, they broadly associate the word with slavery and the civil rights movement in the United States. Of course they hear the word at school and on the bus, etc., but now they can see the casual, even ridiculous meanings and usage of the word against the backdrop of what it means more seriously to others in history and in their community. I hope that they can distinguish context but still have a healthy respect for the (negative) power of the word.
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less I say, smarter I am
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