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Originally Posted by innovis
Sage, she probably is all BC crazy, but refuses to use her insurance to get anything but the free stuff the county Health Center provides (because she doesn't want her parents to find out). I was a little bitter at the time when I posted this because it was just a bad experience and she didn't help at all. It doesn't really matter how much foreplay we do, although tonight we didn't have the time, but at any rate I've tried massages, kissing, intimate touching, oral, whatever, and nothing gets her the slightest bit wet/hot. I don't know exactly how wet the average woman gets, but I've never experienced her having excessive lubrication or her panties being moist.
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Do you know that you STILL sound bitter? I was real glad Sage wrote what she did... I read your first post and thought, "Geez, well, I could answer the questions here, but there's WAY more going on than that..."
You two need to sit down and talk honestly. Seriously. There's resentment and bitterness in your relationship that is at the souce of your sexual issues. Your message REEKS of it. In my experience (13 year relationship, 10 years married--and all to the same woman!) sex is usually the first place that resentment will show up, but it's rarely the source of the resentment. It will LOOK like it's a sexual issue, but it's not.
To answer the mechanical parts of your questions:
1) Condoms suck. I have had the same experience--the business of putting the thing on and the decrease in sensation leads to immediate floppiness. All I can say about that is, it's better than being called "Daddy".
2) Spit works fine in a pinch. The reason she cringes is that she feels like she "should" be wetter and that there's something wrong with her. You needing to add lube makes her feel wrong somehow. Also, please don't actually
spit on her. You want to use your hand to transfer spit wherever it's headed.