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billege · 03-30-2005, 11:23 PM

I'll take a stab at this one.

Perhaps you look bad with short hair?
I’ve personally seen dozens of women that could look so much better, if they only made small changes. Granted, I’m assuming a lot.

I have this: The "not quite fat girl" at work, you know her? The one squeezing into clothes 2 sizes too small? She’d look 100% better if she wore clothes that fit. However, I damn near guarantee no one will tell her that. That kind of criticism is not handled well. From what you say even “insinuating” that your hair should be longer is worth a rant on a forum. How fragile thy ego is.

Perhaps you, with short hair, do not meet what societally pushed standards of attractiveness dictate; but, those commenting feel you would be closer with long hair.

Further, maybe those around you making this suggestion, are making it because it's a genuinely held opinion intended, and given, with goodwill? You are aware that to be called “socially inept” would be a compliment for many people. Could be they don’t know what kind of power you let their words have over you.

Maybe these men have read one too many copies of their wifie's Cosmo, an obvious bastion of female power, and summarized that all women are looking at all times how to "make that style POP this spring.:

I know that's insane. Crazy even. But, what if?

What if, someone felt they had the right to suggest, in what they thought would be a helpful manner, you grow your hair longer? "Those fuckin bastards!" I say.

They really should keep their opinions to themselves. I mean, by speaking aloud what they think, your fragile ego may shatter / or your feelings might be hurt / whatever, something negative could come of it, however unintentional.

I would make a suggestion:

If you have short hair, and you’re satisfied it’s helping you present whatever image you desire, then be genuinely proud of your hair.
Try remembering that a man who likes long hair, has a right to that. Even more shocking, the bastard can say that out loud. When he does, you should be thinking it’s his loss for finding longer hair more attractive than short.

You are right, that can be presumptuous for a person to tell another adult how to dress. I guess it depends on the motivation of the speaker, and the presentation.

It’s easy to get up on a horse, soapbox, etc. when things like this happen. However, I’d opine that it’s better to learn how to handle criticism. Other people do have opinions. You may not like all of them. Consider them for what they’re worth. But consider them.

03-30-2005, 11:23 PM	#17 (permalink)
billege Watcher Location: Ohio	I'll take a stab at this one. Perhaps you look bad with short hair? I’ve personally seen dozens of women that could look so much better, if they only made small changes. Granted, I’m assuming a lot. I have this: The "not quite fat girl" at work, you know her? The one squeezing into clothes 2 sizes too small? She’d look 100% better if she wore clothes that fit. However, I damn near guarantee no one will tell her that. That kind of criticism is not handled well. From what you say even “insinuating” that your hair should be longer is worth a rant on a forum. How fragile thy ego is. Perhaps you, with short hair, do not meet what societally pushed standards of attractiveness dictate; but, those commenting feel you would be closer with long hair. Further, maybe those around you making this suggestion, are making it because it's a genuinely held opinion intended, and given, with goodwill? You are aware that to be called “socially inept” would be a compliment for many people. Could be they don’t know what kind of power you let their words have over you. Maybe these men have read one too many copies of their wifie's Cosmo, an obvious bastion of female power, and summarized that all women are looking at all times how to "make that style POP this spring.: I know that's insane. Crazy even. But, what if? What if, someone felt they had the right to suggest, in what they thought would be a helpful manner, you grow your hair longer? "Those fuckin bastards!" I say. They really should keep their opinions to themselves. I mean, by speaking aloud what they think, your fragile ego may shatter / or your feelings might be hurt / whatever, something negative could come of it, however unintentional. I would make a suggestion: If you have short hair, and you’re satisfied it’s helping you present whatever image you desire, then be genuinely proud of your hair. Try remembering that a man who likes long hair, has a right to that. Even more shocking, the bastard can say that out loud. When he does, you should be thinking it’s his loss for finding longer hair more attractive than short. You are right, that can be presumptuous for a person to tell another adult how to dress. I guess it depends on the motivation of the speaker, and the presentation. It’s easy to get up on a horse, soapbox, etc. when things like this happen. However, I’d opine that it’s better to learn how to handle criticism. Other people do have opinions. You may not like all of them. Consider them for what they’re worth. But consider them. __________________ I can sum up the clash of religion in one sentence: "My Invisible Friend is better than your Invisible Friend." Last edited by billege; 03-30-2005 at 11:26 PM..