Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community - View Single Post - Shipping Was Extra- A Lot Extra

BigBen · 03-23-2005, 07:49 AM

Okay, I am not justifying anything here. I just want to re-introduce the line of thought that I originally posted on the thread "1000 percent?"

Numbers, statistics and graphs are bullshit. If you think that BIG BUSINESS is fleecing the government for services provided in a hostile environment, you are certainly correct. I see this post and ponder why the Juggernaut has not planned for this event and procured a fast-response refuelling team. To ensure that fuel reaches critical units in a timely fashion, there should be a stand-alone unit ready to deploy with those supplies.

There is the old joke about the accountant who answers the question “What is 2+2?” with the response “What do you want it to be?”

What we have here (Along with those 5000 dollar toilet seats, thank you) is creative bookkeeping by anti-Halliburton lobbyists. I swear, any proper accountant is able to turn a toilet seat or a litre of propane into something huge. Try this on for size:

1. Deferred payments, accounts payable, schedule timing; If I pay you for something that you have yet to deliver, I can push those expenses into another fiscal year. Ethical? No. Is Halliburton supposed to deliver MORE FUEL in the future? Then it is likely that all of the expenses were pushed into the first delivery.

2. Other expenses that are “accidentally accounted for”; Does Halliburton have a good pension and health care plan? Then a lobbyist could un-ethically bring those expenses into the fuel contract, whether they belong there or not. Example…

LOBBYIST: “You pay your people 2 dollars on average in benefits for every widget you produce. The contract you procured from the federal government was for 5 million widgets. Therefore, you have charged the government 10 million dollars in benefits for your contract.”

CONTRACTOR: “The contract was to supply 5 million widgets for 5.1 million dollars. We are supplying at cost, and doing so to relieve excess capacity in this fiscal quarter. How can you say we charged someone something using our average numbers, costs, profits, or expenses?”

LOBBYIST: “WHAT ARE YOU TRYING TO COVER UP?!?”

3. Global contracts and the difference between PRIMARY and ANCILLARY services: If the government has a contract with supplier A for a bundle of goods, properly tendered and accounted for, it is easy for the lobbyist to charge that one of those goods in the bundle is being overcharged. If I am giving you goods A, B and C and services X, Y and Z for the fixed price of 10 dollars, who are you to say that I am overcharging you on service Y because you can get that service elsewhere for 1 dollar? You are ignoring the overall contract, and the possible (nay, probable) savings elsewhere.

4. If this story is true, completely and utterly, then I have one last fallback argument:

I’d rather pay someone else money to deliver an explosive substance in a war zone. Fuck it. I could care less how much it costs. Seriously. This is coming from a guy who has had a few close calls in uniform.

03-23-2005, 07:49 AM	#15 (permalink)
BigBen Comedian Location: Use the search button	Okay, I am not justifying anything here. I just want to re-introduce the line of thought that I originally posted on the thread "1000 percent?" Numbers, statistics and graphs are bullshit. If you think that BIG BUSINESS is fleecing the government for services provided in a hostile environment, you are certainly correct. I see this post and ponder why the Juggernaut has not planned for this event and procured a fast-response refuelling team. To ensure that fuel reaches critical units in a timely fashion, there should be a stand-alone unit ready to deploy with those supplies. There is the old joke about the accountant who answers the question “What is 2+2?” with the response “What do you want it to be?” What we have here (Along with those 5000 dollar toilet seats, thank you) is creative bookkeeping by anti-Halliburton lobbyists. I swear, any proper accountant is able to turn a toilet seat or a litre of propane into something huge. Try this on for size: 1. Deferred payments, accounts payable, schedule timing; If I pay you for something that you have yet to deliver, I can push those expenses into another fiscal year. Ethical? No. Is Halliburton supposed to deliver MORE FUEL in the future? Then it is likely that all of the expenses were pushed into the first delivery. 2. Other expenses that are “accidentally accounted for”; Does Halliburton have a good pension and health care plan? Then a lobbyist could un-ethically bring those expenses into the fuel contract, whether they belong there or not. Example… LOBBYIST: “You pay your people 2 dollars on average in benefits for every widget you produce. The contract you procured from the federal government was for 5 million widgets. Therefore, you have charged the government 10 million dollars in benefits for your contract.” CONTRACTOR: “The contract was to supply 5 million widgets for 5.1 million dollars. We are supplying at cost, and doing so to relieve excess capacity in this fiscal quarter. How can you say we charged someone something using our average numbers, costs, profits, or expenses?” LOBBYIST: “WHAT ARE YOU TRYING TO COVER UP?!?” 3. Global contracts and the difference between PRIMARY and ANCILLARY services: If the government has a contract with supplier A for a bundle of goods, properly tendered and accounted for, it is easy for the lobbyist to charge that one of those goods in the bundle is being overcharged. If I am giving you goods A, B and C and services X, Y and Z for the fixed price of 10 dollars, who are you to say that I am overcharging you on service Y because you can get that service elsewhere for 1 dollar? You are ignoring the overall contract, and the possible (nay, probable) savings elsewhere. 4. If this story is true, completely and utterly, then I have one last fallback argument: I’d rather pay someone else money to deliver an explosive substance in a war zone. Fuck it. I could care less how much it costs. Seriously. This is coming from a guy who has had a few close calls in uniform. __________________ 3.141592654 Hey, if you are impressed with my memorizing pi to 10 digits, you should see the size of my penis.