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Being male I have "limited" experience with the situation. I had a very good friend that was raped when she was fourteen. I met her a couple of years after that and she told me of the rape and it was and probably be the most traumatic thing that will ever happen to her. We were never romantically involved, but we were close and she always discussed things with me including the fact that she was going to save herself for marriage...nothing unusual for me to understand. When she got married she began having problems. Consumation of her marriage was a horrible experience. The technical term I believe was vagismus. Basically a spasm of all the vaginal muscles that prevented penetration of even the smallest object. The therapy consisted of a loving husband that understood the problem (he hadn't known about the rape). Once he understood the problem and was willing to slow down they were able to work thru the problem. The problem is not a physical problem, but that doesnt make it hurt or spasm any less. Its root cause is anxiety (as mentioned) and a physical respone to a traumatic scar of the psyche.
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"When you are courting a nice girl an hour seems like a second. When you sit on a red-hot cinder a second seems like an hour. That's relativity. - Albert Einstein
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