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Admittedly, I've only read through the first page of this thread, but I feel the need to interject. Since I seem to have a numbers of thoughts on this matter, I'll just list them:
a) Some girls do not like internal stimulation, and they never will. Every person is built differently for what makes them feel good. I LOVE oral sex, but I can almost never have an orgasm from it. Combatmedicjen is the same. In fact, in my experience, VERY few women can get off from intercourse alone. Regardless of position, girth and length of the penis, and mental state. If LPM needs clitoral stimulation... so what?
b) There are no such things as sexual screw-ups. Sometimes people are just not compatible. My ex-girlfriend and I had a LOT of problems with sex. It's hard to explain, but it could be very frustrating for both of us. I've never had problems with anyone else, so I always assumed it was a "problem" with her. Thinking back on it now, I realize that it was most likely "us" that had the problem, not her. *shrug*
c) Yes, young guys (and even not-so-young guys) are prone to excessive horniness sometimes. That doesn't mean it should interefer with their lives. NWL... learn some damned control. Yes, you CAN go without. That's not control. If you go for a few days and get over-stimulated, perhaps you have a problem. Yeah, if I don't get off at least once a day, I can become irritable... but you have to let it go. A LOT of things make me irritable. If I'm a dick to those around me, or make them upset, it's still MY problem.
d) The flip side for LPM... the suggestion has been put out to get checked by a doctor. Sex should not be actually painful. If it is, there may be something else that's wrong. Do you use condoms? Perhaps you have latex allergies. If you don't, perhaps you are allergic to semen (it happens). Maybe there is an on-going infection. Maybe it's nothing at all... Regardless, you should see a doctor.
e) If this is such a huge problem for you, perhaps you need to back off and look at the relationship from a different angle. I gaurantee you 100% that if this state of mind continues for both of you, you will NOT have a happy marriage. It's about way more than sex, but if sexual problems can cause this much anguish, it's a bad omen of things to come.
f) Urges can come and go... When we first met, CMJ and I got it on like crazed rabbits. After she got back from Basic Training, she didn't have the same sex drive anymore. I was horny all the time, but she was not. I respected that and life went on. Sure, I jacked off... but I also didn't let her know everytime I did. That's not good for one's self-esteem. Recently, she stopped using her birth control (the patch), and the result is a MASSIVELY increased libido. Lately, with things on my mind, I've not been quite as horny. Now it's a reversal. She'll be getting all frisky, and I'll be trying to sleep. I'm sure she plays with the little man in the boat... it doens't bother me. The point is, do your thing... as long as you're being faithful, and understanding of each other, it should all be good in the end.
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