Quote:
|
Originally Posted by Stiltzkin
I've had two separate people show great interest in me, and I tried to force myself to become interested in one of them, but that simply did not work out. I suspect that I'm not the only one who can repeat what I have said as a personal experience.
|
I've had this experience and the same result
I think the concept of unconditional and conditional love comes into play here too. Conditional love being that you love someone for what or how they make you feel about yourself. Unconditional love, I think, would have more to do with a deep mutual respect and caring without the needy aspect.
Redjake: I think I tried to love one because I felt obligated by his love for me, however this would have been a more 'conditional' love. It was something that I couldn't go along with for a life long partner, even though it seemed like the more powerful 'feeling', I couldn't envisage the day to day with him or even wanted the day to day with him. Upon reflection, the fact that his love for me was conditional as well means that because I wouldn't go there, he went elsewhere (quite quickly I might add! - ouch!).
The other I would call closer to an unconditional love, I like/love/respect the other despite the fact that I don't have all my needs met by him - at this point I have not met anyone else I would like to spend my life with although it has it's difficulties. The reflection here also is that despite me going elsewhere, he respected my needs at the time and he was still here when I got back. So I'm guessing his love is more the unconditional type.
Sorry if that's "overshare" but I thought it relevant to this discussion.