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I'd like to bring this topic up again: How many of you think you would be able to pick a random person and love them after a period of time?
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I know for a fact that this isn't true of me. I had three serious relationships before I met my SO. I wasn't in love in any of them, no matter how much I wanted to be. In the last one, I liked the guy enough that I could have stayed with him for a very long time; we liked each other, we shared interests, we were compatable socially and tempermentally, we were mostly compatable socially. But I didn't love him, not romantically; I don't think I could love any man in that way. And he could sense this, and it pushed him away. We tried to love each other, but we couldn't.
With my SO, it was effortless. I lusted after her the moment I saw her, and knew I loved her within a couple of months. Nothing I had ever felt came close; I never had loved anyone before, I just didn't know that until I met her and discovered what true love is.
Can we learn to love someone? I don't doubt that we can. But I doubt that we can learn to love
anyone. I've tried. It just doesn't always work.