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Old 02-26-2005, 08:54 AM   #1 (permalink)
thubpt
Tilted
 
Location: Chapel Thrill
Call Center Blues.

Alright. I’m one of the billions of call center reps out there, that sit tied to a phone for 8-12 hours a day, providing you with cellphone/techsupport/payroll/benefits/ordering help – you name it, there’s a call center for it. Mine happens to provide payroll and hr assistance to a large corporation with some smart, and VERY high paid individuals. After the fifth day of hell (ie, tax season) I’ve decided, there must be some rules in place for you, the consumer, calling in to me, the CSR.

1. The sighing has got to stop. Yes, I know you’re in a hurry, and you feel like I’m just too incompetent to do my job, but – do realize, the entirety of the information you are requesting from me is sitting in multiple databases, that rely on Win2K to pull up. It could take a couple of minutes.

2. Please don’t eat while you’re on the phone bitching me out. I know you have no respect for me, and what I do, but I can only adjust the volume so much – and you chompin on the potato chip while you’re bitching about Uncle Sam’s dues being 2 cents higher this year than last year, it’s not conducive to me giving you the best service possible. Put the bag down, you won’t waste away. Or – please stick to soft foods. . . . or, how about just apologizing for chewing in my ear?

3. When I say – “Is there anything else I can assist you with today?” – this means it’s the end of the call. If you have further requests, great – let me know, and I’ll be happy to help. Don’t use this question as an invitation to insult me, please. Most call centers require this question at the end of every call. I know you’re frustrated, and you feel like you’ve not been assisted in the way you want – but if you ask for something, and I say I’ll put in that request, AND make a followup call to let you know that this request has been fulfilled and shipped . . . I’d say I WAS assisting you to the fullest extent of my abilities. When you have the nerve to say “Well, you haven’t assisted me this far”, now that’s just a low blow. Everyone has their limitations. Getting it to you yesterday just isn’t gonna happen.

4. Does it hurt to be nice? I understand if it’s physically painful for you to put on a smile when you call me, but I’m forced to do so. I’m a human too. I have bad days, coffee that’s too weak, a rampant flu bug knocking out my co-workers left and right, a bad case of the cramps, my paycheck screwed up or missing, landlord knocking on my door. I’m sympathetic to all of your plights . . . .even in the midst of all of my crap. There’s an old saying that goes: You catch more flies with honey than with vinegar. It’s true. Be nice to me – I’ll go out of my way to provide you with the best customer service possible. Be mean to me – I’ll do just enough so my quality score doesn’t dip, and my call handle time doesn’t fluctuate. I’m amazed that people call in, and still believe that in order to get anything done, they have to be gruff, mean, and rude. Not so, my friends, not so.

5. Last one for now – if you’re not getting what you want from me, don’t always assume that if you ask for my supervisor, they’ll be able to give it to you. I know in some call centers this one works. Supervisors do have more leeway to get things done . . . but not always. So, in short, you can ask for one, but it’s not always going to get you anywhere. Sorry.

6. Oh, and if your call center experience was good – made you happy, got your stuff done, and you have the time, that’s a good time to ask for a supervisor. Trust me. I make it a rule to always ask for a supervisor if the CSR has been helpful. Positive escalations go a long way towards making a CSR’s day.

That being said – sorry for the rant – it’s just been a long week. I’m off to call the cell phone company, and see if can get my phone upgrade. Let me just grab my Tostitos . . . . . . .
__________________
The knack of flying is learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss.

--Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy
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